plz talk dirty to me
I looked at my own cervix.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
