Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
