that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
