i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
