idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Randomize
