it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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