i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
