Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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