You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
