I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just want to make out with him forever
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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