she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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