Pants 0. Shit 1.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
