it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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