I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
