An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
