Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Randomize
