He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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