The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
