You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
