Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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