I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
