youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize