I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
