I heard we made out
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
