Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize