I only kidnapped one of them. chill
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
dude. I can hear the air.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
