Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
