My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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