I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Randomize
