What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
