Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
