Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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