Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
