I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
