I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Randomize