you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
What a dumb baby whore.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Randomize
