and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
