I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize