Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
