now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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