another moral hangover. fuck.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
