Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
