You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
