What a fucking waste of an outfit
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
