Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize