drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
