I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
