Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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