After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize