Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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